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Moving on to more practical matters ... as I have some hectic days coming up now. I basically hope I can survive until November 1st, when I should be able to take a well-earned relaxing holiday - I hope! I know I haven't written here in ages, so I thought I'd give you a little insight to what is actually going on these two weeks. I guess it's not over-the-top, but since I haven't been feeling great, I get tired a lot easier and things usually take longer to finish.
But here we go...
Tomorrow I have lectures (Greek) 8-10. Right after that there is a mentor meeting (which I would have liked to attend, as I have been to very few), but I am meeting my Greek teacher then, for a bit of a run-through of the latest grammar. Since I haven't been doing so great the last few weeks, I feel I have missed some things, and he agreed to take a while after lectures and run it by me again ...
Then I'm meeting Lena at Uni, she has a group exam in her New Testament course, and it's nice to be able to catch up when we're both at the Department at the same time! When I come home, I have a few errands in town that I have been putting off, and I'm definitely hoping to get them done tomorrow! *fingers crossed*
On Thursday I think I "only" have lectures in the morning ... which means I should be able to get home early and get a lot of studying done. *fingers crossed again*
Friday will be a long day. Greek lectures 8-10, and then I'll probably be working on my essay in the library. At 4.15, the professor I had in Old Testament Hebrew (twice!) will give his last lecture at the Department, and I really want to attend. He's one of the better teachers I've had, and it will be a loss to the Department that he won't be teaching anymore - but I'm very much looking forward to his lecture, I'm curious what it will be about!
Anyway, that will mean I'm not home until quite late ...
On Saturday is the Wedding!!! Lena and Tobias are getting married on Saturday, and guess who's invited as the unofficial photographer? *gulp* It's going to be wonderful to be there, but I can't help being a bit nervous. I've only attended one wedding in my life, and that was 15 years ago! And I also actually turned down a wedding invitation from a friend a few years ago, when I wasn't feeling so great ... so yeah, I'm pretty nervous. Will be fun doing a lot of photographing though! :) I'm definitely not a pro in any way, but I enjoy it a lot, and hopefully I'll be able to get some nice shots of the happy couple!
And then things get a bit tricky ... becuase I know I'll probably need some time to wind down and calm myself down after the wedding (things like that always require some "recovery-time" for me, even though I'm doing way better than ever before), and the problem is I don't have that time. Sure, Sunday, but I cannot take Sunday off, because on Monday morning, I have this major essay seminar which I'm in a complete state of panic about!!
I have neglected most of the work on my essay and what I have been doing on it just feels silly and stupid and not something that will ever work out. I have had a few previous bad experiences with essays that didn't get written, and I think that has stuck in my mind, because it seems absolutely impossible for me do work this out. And presenting some of it as a seminar is NOT something I'm looking forward to, especially since everybody is going to have oppinions, you're supposed to bascially defend the parts of your essay you are presenting - SCARY!! I also know that the two professors leading the seminar are very demanding, which I really like ... I'd rather have that than a professor who doesn't care ... but demanding professors also means a LOT more criticism - and I do not take even constructive criticism well. *gulp*
I will be missing a Greek lecture on Monday too, because the lecture and the seminar collides ... but I cannot miss the seminar, so I'm just gonna have to live with it.
The rest of that week is bascially Greek lectures Tuesday and Wednesday, one or two mentor meetings - which I HAVE to attend!!! - and then the huge exam on Friday morning (8 a.m. through 1 p.m.).
And after that, I have a feeling I'll be more dead than alive ...
Yep, that's my "come-back-entry" ... here's what's going on right now, and hopefully I'll be able to sort it out ... I'm not saying everything has to be perfect, but a lot of things now need work if the consequences aren't going to be too dire.
I need to go to all the lectures that are left ... (except the one I'll miss because of the seminar).
I need to at least make a decent impression on the essay seminar, to feel I have any chance of ever finishing this essay.
I need to pass the Greek exam, otherwise things will be very complicated.
And I really want my two "personal challenges" - which is the retirement lecture on Friday and the wedding on Saturday - to work out for me. I know that I'm probably oversensitive when it comes to things like that, I tend to notice things nobody else notices etc. - but I need to feel pretty good about it for my own confidence. Fact of the matter is, the most important thing is how I feel about the things I'm doing, not how everybody else reacts ...
Long entry ... I think I'd better head back to my Greek grammar now, so I'm prepared for tomorrow! :)
Pic of the Day:
To Lena, whom I know is struggling to make things work out right now! Hang in there - you'll make it work in the end - I have every confidence in you!
My Life At The Moment!
Currently reading: Död i ruta ett, Olov Svedelid
Currently watching: The X-Files, season 4
Currently listening to: Nothing
My Plans for tomorrow: Lectures, meeting with the teacher, meeting Lena, running errands, studying