You think the title sound weird? That's nothing compared to what I'm feeling right now!
But the title did have a purpose, so I'll do my best in explaining it! :)
First of all - I'm an addict! I kind of knew before, started realizing it yesterday and it was totally confirmed today. Now, not to fret ... it's not drugs! Or alcohol! You have one guess left!
That's right: COFFEE!
I don't drink much, actually, so I'll give myself credit for that! Even now in total-full-extreme-study-mode I generally don't drink more than two or three cups a day, which I think is fairly okay! The addiction part comes in the morning ....
I wake up, pretty much all the time, feeling soooo grumpy and angry and generally pissed off at everything, my life is hopeless and everything is terrible. Give me two mouthfuls of coffee, and there I am feeling the world might not be such a bad place after all, and I should start doing what I am supposed to be doing!
I don't think it's that bad considering I don't drink way to much (although I know I should learn to eat something before that coffee .... ), but it's kind of scary to see the radical change in my mood!
Over to the other part of the title: Me Living In A Bottle!
I really feel like I do! I'm not going out, I'm hardly answering my phone, my apartment is probably the most horrid looking place in southern Sweden right now, because I never can get away from studying for a long enough time to clean it up ... It feels weird! It really does feel like I'm living in some Old Testament/Hebrew bubble that I can't get out of! Now I know this is the last few days of this entire semester, and I'm actually not feeling way too down (just had my coffee, so now I'm civil again! ) - but it does feel strange! I know it will change after Thursday, so it's not the end of the world!
One thing that does not feel so good though, is what happens after Thursday! Well, I guess it is good, but in a way it's not! (Okay, if you expect me to be all rational and not at all confusing right now - you're expecting way to much of me!!)
I have my last exam on Thursday and I've set aside Thursday and Friday for my own days! I need to relax after all this, but first and foremost I need to summarize and deal with this semester, because it has been ... probably the most eventful and developing months of my life - and I need to deal with that properly!
On Saturday I'll head up to Gothenburg, my Dad will meet me there, and I take his car (he takes the train back), so I have a car here for my trip to the summerhouse.
Saturday afternoon and Sunday will be CLEANING DAYS! It feels like I should rip the paint off the walls in order to get it properly cleaned ... but I guess I'll settle with the usual stuff! :)
Then, sometime during next week - not too late, say Wednesday or Thursday (might be Thursday ...) I will head up north, and for now it looks like I'll be staying threre throughout July, but come home for good at the beginning of August. I rather like that solution, I won't be going back and forth, and if I can get back here in the beginning of August, I'll have about three weeks vacation at home before Uni starts again.
The problem part with this solution is that I will hardly get to see any of my friends before August!!! I've been Miss Completely Boring this semester, and especially now, since I've studied so much. Late May and June has been the worse because everybody has finished their studies and are hanging out and celebrating, and all I'm doing in translating Hebrew hymns ... *sigh* I do really really really hope I can fit in as many friends as possible in the beginning of next week - even if it will be nothing big, but I hope I can spend at least a few hours with some of them before I disappear! I guess I should start emailing and see how many I can fit in in a day, right?! *lol* (Anybody reading this and wants to squeeze in some time in the beginning of next week (might work Sunday too, if we're not at my place! *lol*), feel free to let me know!)
Okay, now I've been sitting here for almost 15 minutes and longer breaks than that are not allowed. Back to Hymn 77 now, before next break! :)
Take care, guys!
My Life At The Moment!
Currently reading: Theology of the Old Testament, Walter Brueggemann
Currently watching: Angel season 1 - if I ever turn on the TV
Currently listening to: Nothing
My Plans for tomorrow: Well DUH! Studies - also meeting a professor for some 'mini-exam-thing'.