Monday, 10 November 2008

I Am Stupid!

Pardon the title, but that's just the way I feel right now!
This ties in with the last entry here, about my weekends not being so great ... and boy, is that true! Today I've had an active day, a bit too much stress - and I have a lot to do before I can go to bed tonight (try a lot of cleaning and translating 43 verses from the Gospel of Mark *gulp*), but I feel waaaaay much better than I did during the weekend!
So why can't stupid-stupid me just realize that I feel better when I actually DO things!!! Sure, it's nice to relax and watch TV and spend time on the computer and reading books, I'm the first person to admit it - but there is another side to it as well!! First and foremost: I do have a lot going on in my life right now, meaning a lot of deadlines, and if I don't work my ass off, I'm not gonna make it! Period! That's one part of it, and the second part is that I actually like what I'm doing now!! I enjoy my studies, I'm doing really well, not only my exam results but the entire University situation is better now than I had even dared to hope for... and also ... this is what I want to do with the rest of my life! Okay, perhaps not study for written exams - but I want to "study" (in a somewhat loose sense of the word) for the rest of my working career, learn things, teach, do research, parttake in projects - and all of that is actually similar to what I'm going through right now (except I'm hoping the time-pressure might not be quite as tough all the time!)!!

I know I usually mess up my weekends, and it's a bit early to say that I'll do better next weekend *lol* but I'll certainly try! Today has been an intense day, but it has so far worked out really really well, and once again I have handled things in a good way that I probably wouldn't have handled at all earlier ...
I really hope I can keep this in mind during the weekends as well, because it's really getting obvious that I feel sooooo much better when I'm active and doing things!

And in saying that, I should now do a sweep in my kitchen and bathroom, take out the vacuum and start translating Mark chapter five (though I'm not sure I'm up for doing all of it at once! *lol*)


The Darkest Night said...

I think you do have a point; not that you are stupid - duh!, but that the weekends usually work out better when you have stuff planned!

I tend to like those weekends better, but on the other hand if I am too busy during the weekend I usually don't do so great during the following week.. .my problem is finding the balance there, which I hardly ever manage to do...

Jessica said...

I think you're right, it is hard to find a working balance, where you do enough to feel that you're not wasting your time, and yet you relax enough to make you cope with the upcoming week!
Life sure isn't easy! :)