Things are not going great now, that's for sure. I'm feeling really down and sad and upset, and I have a week ahead of me that I wouldn't wish on anyone ... I don't really know how I'm supposed to actually go through it, and the fact that I need to actually perform - or the consequences will be severe - makes me feel even worse.
I don't really feel comfortable pouring my heart out in a public blog, so I'm sorry if this is a little bit short, but my week basically looks like this:
Meeting with an Old Testament teacher, introduction to an OT-course where I'm mentor, and where I'm supposed to say "something" in front of the group, an oral exam, a talk with "my professor" that I have no idea how to do, discussion regarding two essays I have hardly given any thought at all, and essay seminar - for the two essays I don't know anything about - an OT-lecture and a regular mentor meeting, cleaning the entire apartment to prepare for my trip, try to find a new bathroom carpet (mine will be replaced while I'm gone), STUDYING (duh!!) plus a number of other errands and things to just "get done".
I'm feeling pretty awful at the moment, and going from complete apathy to outright terror ... and that is not the best type of preparation for a week like this!!
I'm really looking forward to my trip, as I think I'll need it as a way of gathering my composure again, trying to deal with everything that has been going on, that I haven't had time for now, and really try to come to terms with ... everything! Hopefully I can feel better and be ready to take on life again after that!
I know this is a short entry, shorter than I usually keep my blog entries, but I actually don't feel up to writing right now. I have a hard enough time writing in my diary at the moment, and this is a lot harder ... I can't guarantee the updates of next week, considering how it'll be - but at least I promise to make some kind of summary update next weekend, before my trip.
I hope you are all doing well!
(--> My personal blog, Me, Myself and I, has been updated <--)