Saturday, 5 January 2008

2007 - 2008

Well, I guess it's time to look back at the year 2007 and look forward to 2008 now.

2007 wasn't exactly one of my better years, although I feel in retrospect I've learned quite a lot. Despite the fact that a lot of things "went wrong" or made my life complicated, I think I have now realized what went wrong and why, which makes me hope I won't put myself into those kind of situations again!
During the spring, it was mostly anxiety that held me back and made things difficult for me. I don't have the time or the energy right now to evolve on that, but I think I do know why I felt so terrible, why I let the anxiety control me the way I did, and I have high hopes I won't allow that to happen again.
Summer was okay, but a bit too intense, as I ended up spending a bit too much time in the summerhouse and with my families! I have nothing against them at all, but I am in the middle of creating my own life right now, without being dependant on anyone, and spending too much time living with my familiy makes me feel like I'm 15 years old again - and doing nothing for my liberation!
I had high hopes for the autumn semester, but unfortunately they more or less fell through! This time though not because of anxiety but rather apahty! I spent about 1½ months in a state of almost complete apathy, and I'm since struggling with the consequences of that - you're not really allowed to take 1½ months' breaks when you're studying! I did have a better period around mid-November and a few weeks after that, before I completely broke down, due to most of all exhaustion ... but I'm hoping to get back to that "good", productive period I had for a few weeks now.
Christmas wasn't - as you may have read - the best either, so to summize the year 2007 ; it wasn't a great year!!

I'm trying to look forward to 2008 with a bit more optimism though. I know you can't predict what will happen, and you can't take things for granted, but at least I feel I'm taking this lousy year with me and will try to use my experiences from 2007 so as to not let the same thing happen again. I know other things can, and probably will, happen, but at least I can prevent the same thing from happening again. As time goes by I really do feel I'm learning more and more about myself, and I'm hoping I can use that in my practical every-day-life, hoping it will somehow work out better and better.

Therefore and hereby, I will try to put 2007 well and truly behind me, but at the same time use these experiences to make sure 2008 will be a lot better.

I'm wayyyyyy behind on my studies now, and I'm not sure I'll be able to sort it out the way I had hoped, but I am confident I will sort it out, one way or another! I have a really tough semester coming up, because I think I will take double courses all semester, meaning I'll be studying 200% all semester ... *yikes* Still, this is something I feel I want to do and that will benefit me in the longrun, so I hope I can keep my motivation up!

I hope you all will have a truly wonderful year 2008!


The Darkest Night said...

I hope 2008 will be a wonderful year for you! You deserve it! *hugs*

Jessica said...

Aw, thank you sis!! I certainly wish you the same, you've had your fair share of bad things during 2007 to last A LOT of years, so I'm definately hoping 2008 will be better!

The Darkest Night said...

thanks sis! *hugs*
I remember when 2006 was over I thought well 2007 can't possibly be as bad.... I turned out to be way wrong, as it's possibly been the worst year of my life... I'd like to think 2008 will be better...can't say it's had a good start, but there's still time left, right?

Jessica said...

Absolutely! Since we don't know what lies ahead, all we can do is try to take one day at a time and try to get by ... but I REALLY hope you'll get a better year 2008!!!!!