Monday, 29 September 2008

Chaos And Grumpy!

This morning was a bit chaotic, and didn't at all turn out the way I had planned or hoped! *sigh* I didn't get to Uni at all (sorry, am not in an explaining mood tonight), and that was cause for grumpiness. Then things just turned out really "weird" ... I was going to do things and then I changed my mind and then I kind of ended up doing them anyway and ... : "weird" ...

What is most worrying is how non-efficient I am right now though - because that really has me worried!! I am completely exhausted every minute of the day - which isn't much fun! At any given time, if I lay down, I think I'd fall asleep within 30 seconds! And that makes it very hard to focus and concentrate ...
But I can't tolerate that either! I have been lacking in studies for so long now, it won't work if I don't give it all I have and more than that!!!!!!! *upset* I'm mostly keeping up with my Greek studies, not completely, but I feel like I'm pretty up to speed, and even though you can always learn more grammar, I think it's working out.
I am however, super-worried about my essay - because it seems just hopeless. I don't know what I'm doing, what I should be doing, what I haven't done and what should come of it ... and that stresses me out completely! *sigh*
Since I missed lectures today, I don't know how far along we are exactly, but I hope we can keep doing this chapter for at least tomorrow, so we won't go through any new stuff then, beacause that would MAYBE give me SOME time to get started on my essay! At this point, it's basically reading a LOT of books to get an idea of how to go about it, what to focus on etc, but reading takes time - you can't plough through 2000 pages in a few hours ... *sigh - again*

Sorry, I won't go on and on ... This does have me worried, but I know the only thing that can ever change it is if I get my act together and start really studying! Period!

My Life At The Moment!
Currently reading: Diamonds are forever, Ian Fleming
Currently watching: 2½ Men
Currently listening to: Nothing
My Plans for tomorrow: Terrible Tuesday Two: lectures 8-10, mentor meeting 10-11, open lecture 11.15, optional essay-lecture 4-6, studies ...

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